Introduction
Who's the best Final Fantasy hero? Let's find out! It's simple,
really. We'll just do a point-by-point comparison and see.
SPOILER ALERT:
Some of these questions involve information about the final moments of
each game. Proceed at your own risk.
Rules of the Game
In each category, I'm awarding 5 points for first place, 3 for
second, and 1 for third, then we'll add them up at the end. Judging
is at my own personal whim.
Why these games?
I've included Final Fantasies 1, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9.
I'd love to add 2 and 3, but I only know a little of 2j's plot, and
an emulator ate my save game 2/3 of the way through 3j... As it is,
my 5 will be a bit rusty as I've only seen the Japanese version, ages ago.
I also thought about adding Chrono, Xeno, Vagrant, etc, but this is
getting out of hand enough as it is. ^_^;
[Ed. Note: Where's FF10 and later? In order to avoid this getting
too big, I've decided to declare this the "NES-SNES-PS1" edition. Up
next will be the "PS1-PS2" edition, presumably including FFVII-FFXII.]
Just who the heck is FF6's main character?
Good question, since nearly every character becomes optional at some
point! Around the middle of the game, Celes is the obvious choice.
Locke gives everyone a good run for their money (er, so to speak).
But in the end, I had to go with Tina/Terra - you start the game with
her, the early parts really center around her, and even though she
drops out for a bit in the last half, she really seems to embody the
spirit of the game.
Credit where it's due...
I originally stole this basic idea from Tiercel, who made a
post along these lines in her LiveJournal. Credit goes to her for
over half of the category titles, and the answer for FF 7, 8, and 9
for those titles.
Enough babble... on with the show!
| Class or Profession - interestingly, they're not all just warriors... | |
| Fighter | Fighter / Knight |
| Cecil | Dark Knight / Paladin |
| Bartz | Traveler (or anything) |
| Terra | Half-Esper |
| Cloud | Mercenary |
| Squall | Soldier (SeeD) |
| Zidane | Thief / Actor |
| Discussion: Well, Terra's is certainly interesting. And Zidane gets big points for originality - who ever thought Thief class would make main character? And changing from dark to light may be cliche now, but it was pretty interesting in FF4. | |
| Points: 5-Terra 3-Zidane 1-Cecil | |
| Weapon - ok, this one's a little dry. Don't worry, more interesting categories are coming up. | |
| Fighter | sword |
| Cecil | sword |
| Bartz | anything |
| Terra | anything |
| Cloud | really big sword |
| Squall | gunblade |
| Zidane | daggers or butterfly polearm |
| Discussion: Tough one. Squall's is original, but it's just so... silly. A few of Zidane's are cool. Hmm. Oh heck, let's just say size matters and be done with it. Moving on... | |
| Points: 5-Cloud 3-Zidane 1-Squall | |
| Clothes ...make the man? | |
| Fighter | bright red plate mail |
| Cecil | dark armor, then light armor and cape |
| Bartz | generic armor, also varies |
| Terra | reddish armor and tights |
| Cloud | dead best friend's military uniform |
| Squall | leather jacket and pants |
| Zidane | lacy shirt |
| Discussion: Hmm, another tough one. In honor of Tiercel, I think I'll have to give the nod to Squall's leather ensemble. Personally, I like Terra's outfit, even in its Amano weirdness. And Fighter's just got that classic look down. | |
| Points: 5-Squall 3-Terra 1-Fighter | |
| Hair - where the heck to these people find so much hair gel? | |
| Fighter | bright red, shaggy |
| Cecil | platinum blond, mid-length |
| Bartz | brown, short (or white, short in Amano sketches) |
| Terra | green, ponytail (or blond, flowing by Amano) |
| Cloud | blond, spiky |
| Squall | brown, short-ish, bangs |
| Zidane | blond, mid-length, middle-part |
| Discussion: Ok, I'm just a sucker for green hair and that's all there is to it. I've heard people say good things about Cecil's hair once he comes out of that helmet. And Squall once again gets a nod from Tiercel for having not only "sexy" but physically possible hair. | |
| Points: 5-Terra 3-Cecil 1-Squall | |
| Best Attack - whatever big flashy things they get to do periodically or when they've been beaten on | |
| Fighter | hit-with-sword |
| Cecil | Dark Wave, later.. um... hit-with-sword? |
| Bartz | variable |
| Terra | Morph (turn into half-esper being that kicks ass) |
| Cloud | Omnislash (hit-with-sword-a-whole-lot) |
| Squall | Lionheart (hit-with-sword-a-whole-lot) |
| Zidane | various weird firey arcane magic |
| Discussion: Sadly, early games get kind of left out here... oh well. Terra's didn't get used often, but the concept was cool. Squall's, while ass-kicking, gets no points for copycatting Cloud. Zidane's are pretty... | |
| Points: 5-Terra 3-Zidane 1-Cloud | |
| Name - what's in a name? Ask namingway. | |
| Fighter | none |
| Cecil | "Cecil Harvey" |
| Bartz | "Bartz Klauser" (sometimes "Butz") |
| Terra | "Tina Branford" ("Terra" in English release) |
| Cloud | "Cloud Strife" |
| Squall | "Squall Lionheart" |
| Zidane | "Zidane Tribal" |
| Discussion: For some reason, the main heroes always seem to get the short end of the naming stick. Poor Cecil, in particular, gets a point just for sympathy. I guess I'll go with Terra for having decent names in either language. And Cloud gets a nod just for starting a streak of silly names... | |
| Points: 5-Terra 3-Cloud 1-Cecil | |
| Love Interest - just the canonical one folks; we'd be here all day if we were talking fanfic. | |
| Fighter | none? Princess Sara? |
| Cecil | Rosa |
| Bartz | maybe Lenna? |
| Terra | none, really, though lots of good friends |
| Cloud | Tifa (and Aerith?) |
| Squall | Rinoa |
| Zidane | Garnet |
| Discussion: This is another hard one, since surprisingly few of the early people have an entry, and the last three are practically the same. I think Cecil takes it just for having a good stable relationship, even if she does keep getting kidnapped. Hmm, I find Garnet less annoying than her predecessors. | |
| Points: 5-Cecil 3-Zidane 1-Cloud | |
| Best Friend - no, I don't mean interceptor. | |
| Fighter | Black Mage? |
| Cecil | Kain |
| Bartz | Boco |
| Terra | Locke, maybe? doesn't really have one |
| Cloud | Zax (deceased) |
| Squall | Zell, sorta, but really a loner |
| Zidane | Blank (stoned), perhaps Vivi later |
| Discussion: Well, Kain is just cool, despite betraying the party several times. And Vivi is cute! Blank's pretty cool at that. And Bartz gets a point just for making a chocobo into a significant character. Whoo-hoo! | |
| Points: 5-Cecil 3-Zidane 1-Bartz | |
| Arch-Enemy - generally the final boss, though not always (see FF4 and FF9) | |
| Fighter | Chaos |
| Cecil | Golbez |
| Bartz | Exdeath |
| Terra | Kefka |
| Cloud | Sephiroth |
| Squall | Ultimecia (passed through other witches, remember) |
| Zidane | Kuja |
| Discussion: I think I'm gonna have to bow to overwhelming fan support on this one and give top honors to Sephiroth. But it's a tough field - Kuja is kinda cool, Kefka is wonderfully nuts, Golbez is regally evil, and Chaos is an elemental incarnation... decisions, decisions. | |
| Points: 5-Cloud 3-Cecil 1-Terra | |
| Recurring Rival/Annoyance - you know them; the supporting bad guys who just won't stay down. | |
| Fighter | none that I remember? |
| Cecil | Kain, perhaps? |
| Bartz | Gilgamesh |
| Terra | Ultros |
| Cloud | The Turks |
| Squall | Seifer and company |
| Zidane | the annoying jesters? |
| Discussion: there's some really good entries here... The Turks have huge fan support and are pretty cool, and the same almost goes for Seifer &co. Gilgamesh, of course, is The Man. But I just have to give props to the one and only, Ultros! 'Don't tease the octopus, kids!' | |
| Points: 5-Terra 3-Cloud 1-Bartz | |
| Home Towns - I'm including all the places they've lived - older places generally get revealed later in the plot | |
| Fighter | Coneria? |
| Cecil | Baron, Luna |
| Bartz | ?? |
| Terra | Empire, Mystic Land |
| Cloud | Midgar Slum, Nibelhiem |
| Squall | Balamb Garden, Orphanage, Winhill |
| Zidane | Lindbulm, another planet |
| Discussion: wow, we've actually got three people here who weren't even born on the same planet/dimension as we're originally led to believe. I think Zidane takes it overall, for that and for both his locales just being generally pretty. I have a certain fondness for Cloud's towns too... | |
| Points: 5-Zidane 3-Terra 1-Cloud | |
| Final Battle Location - the last dungeon is usually someplace a bit... odd | |
| Fighter | Chaos Temple, 1000 years in the past |
| Cecil | the center of the moon |
| Bartz | um, a cleft of dimensions? |
| Terra | atop Kefka's tower |
| Cloud | bottom of the Northern Crater |
| Squall | Ultimecia's Castle, beyond time |
| Zidane | Memoria, a construct of memories |
| Discussion: Interestingly, FF1's time loop still holds up pretty well for weirdness, perhaps beaten only by Squall &co having to go outside time completely to find their end boss. I liked Memoria for general weirdness, too. | |
| Points: 5-Squall 3-Fighter 1-Zidane | |
| Response when asked to help save the world - what's the attitude, yo? | |
| Fighter | "I like swords!" |
| Cecil | "I must do what is right." |
| Bartz | "Let's go on a journey!" (?) |
| Terra | "For the children!" |
| Cloud | "I don't care. Just as long as I get paid." |
| Squall | "Whatever" |
| Zidane | "Which way, and will there be cute girls involved?" |
| Discussion: This category was actually Tiercel's original inspiration, so we'll go with her call of Zidane by a landslide. After that... hmm, weak field. I guess I could give Cloud originality points for being one of the first RPG characters not to care. These days, though, Fighter's approach seems refreshingly straightforward. ^_^ | |
| Points: 5-Zidane 3-Cloud 1-Fighter | |
| Mental Problems - these days, all RPG heroes ought to have a staff psychiatrist... | |
| Fighter | a bit singleminded... "I like swords!" |
| Cecil | initially conflicted over betraying his kingdom, a bit taciturn. |
| Bartz | none that I remember? |
| Terra | tormented by guilt over being used as a weapon of the Empire. Prone to freak Morphing episodes. |
| Cloud | post-traumatic flashbacks, repressed memories, susceptible to mind-control |
| Squall | falls asleep and dreams he's an idiot |
| Zidane | just a short depressive episode |
| Discussion: Ok, do we give this category to people with impressive problems, or people who are actually sane? Argh, I can't decide. Maybe I'll just have to do both. | |
| Sanity Points: 5-Bartz 3-Zidane 1-Cecil | |
| Insanity Points: 5-Cloud 3-Terra 1-Squall | |
| Best Quote Overheard - not that this has much to do with the heroes themselves, but hey... | |
| Fighter | "I, Garland, will knock you all down!" |
| Cecil | "You spoony bard!" |
| Bartz | "A... a girl!?!" |
| Terra | "Don't tease the octopus, kids!" |
| Cloud | "This guy are sick." |
| Squall | "RAGE!", "Doink", "Booyaka!" |
| Zidane | "No cloud, no squall, shall separate us." |
| Discussion: Well, it's obvious that we have to give head honors to the immortal spoony. After that, the knocking down is also classic, and represents a whole era of wacky NES censorship. And I have to admit, that line in FF9 had me on the floor. | |
| Points: 5-Cecil 3-Fighter 1-Zidane | |
Who takes it? Who's cuisine reigns supreme?
Just a quick note... this wasn't rigged. I didn't keep track of
points as I went along, so I'll be as surprised as you at the
outcome. Well, ok, I'll bet Fighter doesn't win first place, but hey,
you never know...
| Final Points - places | Total | |
| Fighter | 0 firsts, 2 seconds, 2 thirds | 8 |
| Cecil | 3 firsts, 2 seconds, 3 thirds | 24 |
| Bartz | 1 first, 0 seconds, 2 thirds | 7 |
| Terra | 5 firsts, 3 seconds, 1 third | 35 |
| Cloud | 3 firsts, 3 seconds, 3 thirds | 27 |
| Squall | 2 firsts, 0 seconds, 3 thirds | 13 |
| Zidane | 2 firsts, 6 seconds, 2 thirds | 30 |
A winner is... Terra!
Terra takes it home by a comfortable margin, with Zidane in a good second
and Cloud fighting him for a close third. Cecil also puts in a very
respectable showing for such an old veteran.
That's all for now...
...but stay tuned; the winners may get shaken up as more games are
released, or I get inspired to add new categories. Anything can
happen in the Gratuitous Final Fantasy Hero Battle!